Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
I nodded again, stealing a glance at the man from beneath my lashes. I found it difficult to read the guy. His gaze was direct and penetrating, taking in everything around him. When they met mine, I felt a jolt of emotion. Not fear, exactly, but I knew he could see straight through to the very core of me and saw the wreckage hidden underneath the surface. His eyes were intense but kind.
The longer he looked at me, the more his gaze narrowed. He looked almost startled. He turned his head slightly toward me and rubbed the center of his chest absently as though it ached.
I dropped my gaze immediately, studying the scuffed toes of my shoes. My chest tightened with the familiar anxiety that men triggered in me. This man saw things I didn’t want him to see. I knew it like I knew my own name.
“Good to meet you,” I managed to say. I backed toward the door, eager to escape the intensity of his gaze. “I should let you get back to it.”
Rip nodded once. He still hadn’t spoken, but somehow his silence wasn’t threatening. It felt considerate. As if he understood that his voice might be too much for me right now.
I slipped out of the doorway and leaned against the wall in the corridor, breathing deeply to slow my racing heart. Through the partially open door, I could hear Hannah resuming their conversation as if they hadn’t been interrupted.
I pushed away from the wall and headed back toward the common area, my mind replaying those few moments of eye contact. There had been something oddly comforting about the weight of his gaze. Rip hadn’t given me the predatory assessment I’d grown accustomed to from Eric but simply waited. Watchful in the way a guardian surveys their charge.
Strangely, for the first time since arriving at Haven, I felt truly seen. Not as a victim or someone who’d betrayed her best friend, but as a person worth protecting. The sensation was as unsettling as it was reassuring. I also knew I didn’t deserve his protection. Or anyone’s really. Maybe that was why I didn’t want to leave. I knew once I did, I’d be on my own to fend for myself and I didn’t know if I could.
Most residents retreated to their rooms after dinner, but I found myself gravitating toward the open spaces. Tonight I sat at a low table near the bookshelves, helping Lynne, a nine-year-old with gap teeth and perpetually untied shoelaces, go through her multiplication tables.
I smiled as she worked through her homework, her tongue poking out between her teeth with the effort. Lynne’s mother, Tanya, had started attending the GED prep classes Haven offered three nights a week, leaving Lynne in the unofficial evening childcare rotation that the residents had organized amongst ourselves. Mia worked with the adults and the kids, but I helped with homework.
Mia and I hadn’t had a meaningful discussion yet. I tried to stay out of her way. She was nice enough, but she no longer acted like my best friend and I had no one but myself to blame. One more reason I really needed to leave Haven and Nashville altogether.
“I hate math,” Lynne grumbled, pulling me back to her homework. “When am I ever gonna use this?”
I laughed softly. “More than you’d think. Remember when we made cookies last weekend? How do you think we doubled the recipe? That’s all math.”
Her eyes widened. “That doesn’t count. That’s just cooking.”
“Cooking is science and math together,” I told her, tapping her paper. “Two more problems, and we can take a break.”
I felt a strange awareness of being observed. In my former life, Eric’s scrutiny had been a prelude to criticism or worse. But the gaze I felt now was different.
I turned my head and saw Rip sitting in the security office with the door open. Most of the guys kept the door shut unless they thought the noise from the kids playing got too loud. Tiny said noise meant the women needed help rounding up the “little hellions,” and he liked to watch the fun. Rip had a small, contented smile behind his short beard, like he enjoyed watching the scene before him.
“Done!” Lynne announced, pushing her completed worksheet toward me with pride.
I checked her work, finding only one mistake. “Amazing job. I’m so proud of you!” I squeezed her hand gently, and Lynne preened at my encouragement and praise.
While she packed away her things in her backpack, I glanced back at Rip. He still smiled, but nodded at me, a small acknowledgment. Then he turned back to his work.
Helping the children here made me feel more like my former self than anything else. The me before Eric. The intelligent, self-assured young woman who would surely make her mark in the world.