Total pages in book: 61
Estimated words: 60077 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60077 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
Bastian’s finding the holidays to be much more stressful this year when he discovers his frustrating neighbor has somehow ended up with a Secret Santa Daddy and is doing his best to throw himself into discovering his little side. Now he needs to figure out how to chase off the scam artist and protect Orlando from himself…because that’s what a good neighbor would do, right?
What’s a cutie to do when the man of his dreams keeps putting his head in the sand? Invent a Secret Santa, of course.
Author’s You first met Orlando in Who’s Your Daddy (Secret Santa Daddy, Season 4), and while you don’t need to read that one before you enjoy Orlando’s book, it would help explain some of the shenanigans and why he keeps quoting the wonderfully smart Terrence
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Chapter 1
Orlando
“No, he got me a cute Build-a-Bear. It’s dressed up just like me at work…yeah…a little tool belt and everything. I don’t know how he did it but my Secret Santa is the best.”
Sound cheerful but not too giggly.
Happy but not devious.
Not too loud because then he’d become suspicious and realize I was talking to no one.
Phones really were amazing because no one could ever tell if there was someone on the other end or not. They also made it easy for me to look so distracted I wouldn’t notice my sexy and slightly nosy neighbor inching closer to the fence that separated our properties.
“No, the first one was that card and the chocolates. Yeah, he had to get those mailed out. They don’t sell them around here, so he’s been planning this out for a while.” Pretending like I was my cousin’s new boyfriend Terrence who was always oversharing with his best friend Leander made the necessary deception even easier.
I’d listened to him for weeks while we’d worked on his house and all I had to do was make his conversations sound more like me and less like I was a naughty and easily distractable spy.
Or whatever he did for a living.
Our whole family was convinced he was CIA or something, but I didn’t care because he was hilarious and I wanted to be him when I grew up.
Ha.
I didn’t have to grow up because I was going to be a little and that meant I could be young forever.
I just needed to get a Daddy first to make the rest fall into place.
Unfortunately, the man who was perfect for that position was slightly stubborn and convinced he was too old for me. That just meant I had to get creative. Terrence said that was the best way to make sure he got his way, so it had to be right.
He was really smart…strange…but really smart.
“They were moan-worthy and well…I shouldn’t tell you just how good they were.” Because I couldn’t compare chocolate to orgasms the way Terrence had without sounding ridiculous. I’d tried several times while I’d been practicing and it’d never sounded right.
I could pretend to laugh, though, because I was just embarrassed enough to want to giggle as I paced around the dark backyard. “You think there’s any left to share? Don’t be stupid. I ate them so fast I proved I don’t have a gag reflex.”
Terrence had eaten most of them so fast he’d given himself a stomach ache and had to postpone his afternoon orgasm session. That was the point where he’d realized the error of his ways and had shared the rest while he’d pretended to have good manners.
But my gag line sounded much better and wouldn’t worry my grumpy Peeping Tom as much.
“If I get more, I’ll think about it.” My imaginary phone person wouldn’t care if I didn’t share fake chocolate, so I could promise without having to worry. “Yes, I’m getting presents every couple of days, so I’m excited to see what I get tomorrow.”
This was the part where my nerves started to stand up and ask me what the hell I was doing. But I had a plan that I knew even Terrence would be proud of and that would make his friend Leander go off like I was crazy.
That was how I knew it was perfect.
Everything fun and interesting made Leander worry…and honestly…I was just doing Santa a favor to make sure I got what I wanted for Christmas.
Bastian.
“I can’t decide if I want something sweet and grown-up or if I want something cute and fun like toys to go with my bear.” Oh, I was going to have to buy Terrence toys to go with his bear. Enzo hadn’t gotten him any. “I’m not sure. He’s been sweet so far and has just been signing things…you can’t tell…promise?”