Total pages in book: 134
Estimated words: 132464 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 662(@200wpm)___ 530(@250wpm)___ 442(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 132464 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 662(@200wpm)___ 530(@250wpm)___ 442(@300wpm)
Out of nowhere, I feel fingers grip my swinging balls... followed by a wet, warm tongue lapping at them furiously... and then, holy fuck, a warm, wet mouth envelops my entire ball sack. With a loud growl, my body hurtles into a brutal release that leaves me gasping for air and certain I’m dying an extremely pleasurable death.
Several moments later, when Kat and I have both stopped quaking, I lie on top of Kat, the most sexual and sensual and beautiful creature I’ve ever encountered—sweat pouring out every inch of my flesh, my breathing ragged, my hands still clasped tightly in hers—and I try my mighty fucking best to understand what the fuck just happened to me.
I realize my brain is likely short-circuiting right now and my thought processes probably aren’t particularly trustworthy, but the more I ponder the situation, the more I think I know exactly what happened. In fact, yep, there’s only one sane conclusion to be reached: my magical, mystical unicorn momentarily transformed into a magical, mystical octopus with a supernatural mouth. Yep, that’s got to be it—or, at least, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Because when a guy’s got a smokin’ hot baby-momma-girlfriend with a white-hot temper, a woman undoubtedly capable of committing double-murder if properly provoked (and that was before pregnancy hormones began coursing through her blood stream, making her even crazier)—and when the guy’s absolutely certain his smokin’ hot future-murderess of a baby-momma-girlfriend would, indeed, feel provoked to kill if she were to believe her firm “no touch” rule had been violated by a certain bisexual supermodel (through no fault of the boyfriend, mind you)—well, then the boyfriend can’t help but conclude it’s most prudent for everyone involved if he conjures a paranormal unicorn-turned-octopus rather than try too hard to come up with any other plausible explanation.
But, hey, the magical-unicorn-turned-octopus theory isn’t really that far-fetched, is it? No, I really don’t think so. Because if there’s one woman in the entire world who could pull off grabbing and licking a man’s balls, and then tea-bagging his entire ball sack like a fucking champ, all while simultaneously getting plowed with her hands firmly pinned above her head and her mouth otherwise engaged in a passionate kiss, then that woman would have to be the one and only magical, mystical unicorn, Katherine Ulla Morgan.
Twenty
Josh
“God, I thought she’d never leave,” I say, pulling Kat away from the door and onto my lap on a nearby couch.
“You were pretty rude to her just now,” Kat says, throwing her arms around my neck and pressing her forehead against mine.
“Fuck Bridgette. I couldn’t wait to be alone with you.” I press my nose against Kat’s until she appears to have one big, blue eye. “Mike Wazowski,” I say.
Kat giggles.
“I can’t believe you paid her to fuck you,” I say. “You’re a savage beast, Kat.”
“She said I had to pay her money as ‘collateral’ to ensure I’d actually go through with it.”
“How much did you pay her?” I ask.
Kat tells me the number with wide eyes like it’s some astronomical sum, and I can barely keep from laughing.
“Babe, Bridgette earns that amount of money per minute as a model.”
“Oh.”
“Clearly, she didn’t come here for the money. In fact, I’m one hundred percent sure she would have paid you for the pleasure of fucking you. Anyone would. Just look at you. You’re a fucking unicorn.” I stroke her hair. “A kinky little unicorn.” I bite her naked shoulder and she squeals.
“I didn’t even know I was that kinky, to be honest,” Kat says. “I thought I’d chicken out after second base, just like I did in college.”
“Well, hot damn, you certainly didn’t chicken out tonight, baby. You rounded third like a pro and slid headfirst right into home.”
Kat giggles. “I guess you bring out the sick fuck in me, Playboy.”
“Oh no, don’t you dare pin your sick-fuckeduppedness on me. You out sick-fucked me by a long mile tonight, baby. I’m the one who said ‘no pussy’ and you begged me to let her keep eating you.”
Kat grins gleefully. “Oh, yeah. I did, didn’t I?”
“You sure did.”
We share a smile.
“I almost passed out at one point. I was seeing pink and yellow flashes of light.”
The hairs on the back of my neck stand up. “Do you think it’s safe for the kumquat for you to come that hard? Maybe we should be taking it easy?”
“No, the doctor said sex and orgasms are fine. I’m just not allowed to sit on a jet engine, that’s the only limitation.”
“You asked the doctor if you could ride your Sybian?” I chuckle. “Oh, Jesus. I can only imagine the dinner conversation your poor doctor had that night with her husband when he asked about her day.”
We both laugh.
“You know she was Googling that shit the minute you left her office,” I add.