Total pages in book: 96
Estimated words: 95019 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 475(@200wpm)___ 380(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95019 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 475(@200wpm)___ 380(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
He sighs. “I just think you were born for something bigger.”
There’s a bite to it. I doubt he meant it that way, but I have to state the obvious. “Do you really think my not playing would make me smaller?”
His brow creases, and he immediately shakes his head. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
I know he didn’t, and I can understand why it isn’t easy for him, so I assure him, “This wasn’t an easy decision, but I know it’s the right one. You have to trust that I know what’s best for me.”
He wears a solemn expression, tucking his head close to his chest. I viscerally feel his disappointment in my chest—a sinking feeling, as though my soul’s about to slip under the table.
Again, he’s quiet for a few moments. “Here I was hoping this would keep my mind off everything else that’s going on.” He runs his fingers through his bangs. “That’s not putting that on you, but it’s just been a rough year. And I can accept that—if this isn’t something you want anymore, I’ll understand, though it might damn near kill me.” He chuckles, though I hear the pain in it too, reminding me why I’ve had to wait this long before telling him. “It’s gonna take me some time to wrap my head around it all, but like you said, you wouldn’t have done this if you hadn’t thought about it already.” He sighs. “Okay. Come on. Give your old man a hug.”
We scoot out of the booth to hug it out, and it’s a firm, full-on hug, the sort I can tell he needs more than I do. I feel for him, but I know I did the right thing. That isn’t the life I want for myself, and as much as it might have helped him to go along on this journey with me, I know he would prefer for me to be happy.
We work out the details. I tell him I’ll call Rachel and sort all that out, and then we get on to more mundane topics, fortunately avoiding the big D-word I don’t want to discuss today.
After we finish up, I head back to Alpha Theta Mu, where I find Lance, Ty, Ash, Dax, Angie, and Marty hanging out in the living area. I notice right away that Marty’s standing beside the sofa, where Angie is twisted toward him, laughing at something he said.
I didn’t realize how relieved I was after talking to Dad until seeing her with Mart makes my shoulders tense up.
Why’s she looking at him like that?
What am I talking about? It’s Angie. They’re friends. And even if they weren’t, that’s totally fine. More than fine. None of my goddamn business. It’s what he really wants.
Although, that doesn’t magically take away the sting in my chest as I approach.
“Hey, guys,” I say, frustrated that I can’t go right to Mart and tell him about my conversation with Dad.
He turns to me, curiosity in his expression since he knew where I was off to and what I was hoping to get off my chest. I get a faint hint of that citrus-cedar scent, unbinding some of the tension that still lingers in me.
“How was lunch?” he asks.
“It went really well.” I grin, and I can tell by the way he smiles he knows what I mean.
“That’s great. I’m glad.”
“You heading somewhere?” I ask Marty. “Why aren’t you sitting down?”
“Oh,” Angie says. “Apparently, he pulled a muscle.”
Now I’m really smiling, since last night was pretty intense, and I love knowing I put that ass through it.
“Did you take up squats all of a sudden?” I tease, since I can’t say what I really want about working out those glutes.
“Something like that,” he says with a mischievous smirk that’s giving me a hard-on.
“I hope it’s not preventing you from getting around campus,” I add.
“It’s not preventing me from doing anything.” He tilts his head in a pointed way, as though making it clear it’s definitely not enough to keep us from having our favorite nighttime ritual.
Thank fuck.
“Why am I not getting a fist bump or a hug?” Ty asks.
Fuck, I’m acting weird, and I don’t want the guys catching on and thinking we’re up to anything. Not that I’d have an issue with it, but I sure as hell don’t want to put Marty on the spot like that. I have no desire to out him before he’s ready, and besides, it’s kind of hot letting this be our dirty little secret.
“I wanted you guys to get along,” Ty adds, “but I don’t need Marty replacing me.”
“Does somebody need some attention?” I ask, heading over to Ty, tackling him with a hug.
“You ass!” he jokes.
“Nobody’s replacing my best bud,” I assure him. “Anybody want to head out for some ice cream?”
“You just ate.”