Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 90951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 455(@200wpm)___ 364(@250wpm)___ 303(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 90951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 455(@200wpm)___ 364(@250wpm)___ 303(@300wpm)
And even more alone.
Because Blue wasn’t Blue anymore, he was a jerk with a checkbook, too stupid to know that wasn’t the tool he needed in that particular situation.
The anger I pushed down when Wella stepped inside flares back to life. “Thank you so much for the update,” I say with forced calm. “We really appreciate it.”
She nods and smiles at both of us now, clearly having decided that Blue isn’t the pregnant-partner-agitating force she initially judged him to be. “I’ll check back in an hour, and we’ll see if we can’t get you ready to head home.”
I thank her again, hands rubbing slowly back and forth over my stomach, playing the peaceful pregnant woman to the hilt until her footsteps fade down the hall.
Then I turn to Blue and hiss through a tight jaw, “You are not covering Clover’s living expenses. I am. She’s my friend.”
“She’s my friend, too,” he reminds me.
“She’s my roommate,” I counter. “And I don’t want her feeling indebted to you.”
“I would never make her feel that way,” he says, looking hurt again. “I promise.”
“You can’t control that. You can’t control how writing someone a check makes them feel. They get to decide that, and I know Clover will feel more comfortable if that money comes from me.”
Blue’s wounded gaze sharpens. “I think we both know this isn’t about Clover. I’m sorry I wrote that check, Bea. You have no idea how sorry. I know it was stupid now, believe me. Probably the stupidest thing I’ve ever done.”
There it is. Finally.
The admission—and the apology—I’ve been longing for.
But it’s too little, too late…isn’t it?
My ribs lock around my heart, warning it not to relax its guard just because he finally said the “S” word. A second later, Bean kicks my spleen, as if reminding me that her father spent five months pretending that she didn’t exist, when she very much did.
And does.
“Okay,” I whisper.
The word hangs in the air, vibrating with accusation.
His brows lift. “Obviously, it’s not okay. But if you’ll give me two minutes to explain, I know I can make this better.”
“How?” I demand, ignoring the stinging at the back of my nose. “How can you make this better? You can’t.”
“I can,” he promises in this genuine, caring way that makes the emotion swelling in my chest even worse.
“No,” I choke out. “You can’t. I can’t forgive five months of nothing, Blue. I’m sorry, but I can’t, and I certainly can’t forget that you—”
“I’m not asking you to forgive or forget. I’m just asking for the chance to—”
“No explanation can make up for that,” I insist, with a shake of my head.
“I understand that.” Frustration mixes with the pleading note in his voice as he adds, “But, Bea, please, if you’ll just listen, I—”
“Maybe I don’t want to listen. Maybe I know better than to listen to someone who pretends to be this kind, wonderful man, only to turn around and—”
I break off with a huff as he surges to his feet.
I expect him to make a break for the door, but he doesn’t.
One second, he’s in the chair, the next, he’s braced one giant hand on the bed beside my hip. The other cups my jaw with a gentleness that mixes dangerously with the intensity in his eyes. Dangerous for me, anyway, a woman who’s far too vulnerable to his touch, even when I’m at my strongest.
And I’m not at my strongest.
I’m scared and exhausted and angry and sad, and then his mouth is on mine, and all the conflicting feelings vanish in a rush of joy.
In the bliss flooding my veins, celebrating the return of Blue’s lips to mine…
We haven’t kissed since that night, since before he apologized for making me come my brains out and called a car to take me home.
Deep down, I knew then that my romantic dreams about us were never going to come true. I should have started grieving that very second. A part of me did, I guess. After all, I wasn’t completely surprised when he was weird. Or when weird turned to weirder, and weirder turned into ghosting me completely.
In fact, the only surprising thing that’s happened between us since that night is…this.
This kiss like a confession, like a beloved chorus, coming back just when you thought the song was over. This kiss that makes my nipples tighten and my panties wet for the first time in weeks.
Maybe months?
I was pretty sure the second trimester had killed what little remained of my sex drive, but apparently not.
Definitely not.
I curl my fingers into Blue’s T-shirt, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss until our tongues twist and dance. Until his sexy Blue smell fills my head and my skin tingles from the press of his fingertips at the back of my neck, and a wicked voice in my head wishes that Wella had closed the door.