Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 86422 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86422 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
This time it takes longer for her to reply, the dots appearing and disappearing a few times before a message finally pops up.
Fee
I’m at my sister’s and I’m currently snuggling with my niece.
Mac
Want me to message you later?
Fee
I can thumb-type one-handed like a pro.
I switch gears, since pouring my heart out seems like something I’d rather do face-to-face.
Mac
How are you feeling about the art show this week?
Fee
Excited. Nervous. It's been cool merging my styles. Plus, it’s different when it’s in a gallery surrounded by other amazing art, and not just a random poster in a hallway. So yeah, a little scared, but mostly good feelings about it.
Fee posted on her secret account that she’ll be at an art show on campus for anyone who wanted to come out and support her. It flooded with comments from fans.
Mac
People are really excited to meet you in person. So many amazing opportunities are headed your way.
Fee
This feels better than the space I’ve given her, and I can’t fix it if we don’t talk, so I take the risk.
Mac
Can I see you when I get home? So we can talk?
There’s another long pause and I resist the urge to spill my guts with my fingers.
Fee
After my art show? I want to be clearheaded and not a bag of nerves.
My stomach sinks, but I’ll take a win where I can. She said yes, even if I have to wait a few days.
Mac
Of course, I totally understand.
Fee
Thanks for being patient. I caught part of the game earlier, btw. You looked really good out there.
Mac
Thanks. I’m definitely playing better, even if that win wasn’t a pretty one.
Fee
They can’t all be smooth.
Mac
I miss you.
Fee
I miss you, too.
Ariel is asking for a snack, so I have to go, but message me tomorrow?
Mac
For sure. Night, Fee.
Fee
Night.
It’s a step in the right direction, and I’ll take it.
CHAPTER 37
FEE
“Do we have everything? Did I forget something? What if we forgot something?” I am a nerves extravaganza.
“We didn’t forget anything. You had it all organized and labeled and we triple-checked before we got in the car,” Lexi assures me.
“And even if we did forget something, one of us can run back to the studio and get it for you since we’re super early,” Cammie adds.
“We’ve got you.” Enid side-hugs me.
“It’s going to be amazing,” Tally says.
“Here, drink this.” Dred passes me a water bottle.
“Thanks.” I take a cautious sip, then another.
She and Lexi came to pick me and the girls up at the studio. If ever there was a time I needed my friends and my sister, it’s tonight. Roman is bringing Ariel and Callie to the show a little later, once we have everything set up.
We pull into the gallery parking lot and bring the pieces inside. Other students involved in the showcase are standing in their designated spots, assembling their own installments. One girl is crying. Another is pacing with her hand covering her mouth. Two guys keep moving pieces around for another artist as they try to get the setup perfect. The energy in the room is frenetic anxiety, light angst, and excitement.
Lexi puts her arm around my shoulder and pulls me into her side. “Take a breath, Big Pheels.”
I do, inhaling to the count of four and exhaling to the same. “I miss Mom,” I whisper, suddenly on the precipice of a feelings waterfall.
“Me, too. Every single day.” She kisses the top of my head and pulls back, hands curving around my shoulders. “She’s up in heaven with your dad, and they’re watching over you right now. They’re so proud of you.” She blinks back her own tears. “We all are, Fifi.”
She’s my sister, but she’s more. She’s the mother figure I need and crave. She wears so many hats for me now, and I am so grateful that she’s here with me.
“I love you,” I whisper.
“I love you, too.” She hugs me again.
And suddenly there are many sets of arms wrapped around me, grounding me.
“Okay.” I shake off all the sads with another deep breath. “I love you, girls, and I really don’t want to mess up my makeup, so let’s save the mushy stuff for later and get set up!”
“You got it, Fee.” Cammie high-fives me. “None of us want puffy eyes.”
We spend the next hour arranging the canvases, allowing the paintings to tell the story.
“Oh, girl.” Cammie links arms with me as we stand in a line, in front of my installation. “First of all, this is so freaking cool, and beautifully moving. Second, I hope you’re prepared for the onslaught of your fans, and also you made Mac look damn good.”
“He’s not hard to paint or look at." My heart aches a little, but after tonight, he and I can talk. I’m nervous about what he has to say, but I know what my feelings are, and what I want. Hopefully he wants the same thing.