Total pages in book: 81
Estimated words: 75999 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 380(@200wpm)___ 304(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75999 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 380(@200wpm)___ 304(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
I put my chin on his shoulder and kiss his neck, my heart overflowing with the love I have for him. “I don’t know. The fear of losing you clouded my judgment too many times lately. I regret not talking to you sooner. I was stewing in my own juices when it came to the whole gay thing. At least I had Aaron to talk to, but I’m so glad you’re with me now.”
Cassian chuckles and picks up a plain waffle. He always eats them like that—on their own—and only gorges on items I’d consider toppings once he’s done with the waffle. He’s weird that way--yet another thing to love about him.
“Aaron? You picked Aaron as your advisor?” Cass asks with a smirk emerging on his face.
“Are you saying that’s why I made so many bad choices?” I laugh and kiss his Adam’s apple. “He helped me with the whole troll thing, but to give him credit, he did say it was a bad idea.”
“Of course he did. He’s so serious,” Cassian says, biting into the waffle. “Now, I’m not dissing him. It’s just that I don’t think he’s ever been with anyone.”
I frown. “Oh. But… he always seems like he knows what he’s talking about.”
I’m torn between the waffle and staying glued to Cassian, but my hunger wins when my stomach grumbles. I turn to the waffles to put syrup and fruit on top as quickly as humanly possible so that I can get back to Cass. He’s not wasting any time though and just hugs me from behind.
Which is… weird. And hot. Because his dick presses against my ass, and I don’t hate it. I’d love his dick pressing into any part of me. Nose, foot, armpit, you name it, I want his dick close.
“Well, he is a bit of a know-it-all, isn’t he?” I chuckle.
“I’m happy that he still had more sense than you,” Cass says, nuzzling the back of my neck as the sun brightens the kitchen.
A pleasant shiver runs down my spine. I love him touching me so much. I hope he never stops.
“The whole troll thing came about because I had this not-so-smart idea that I should anonymously find out whether I want to kiss you, so things between us don’t get weird if the answer’s no. But then you liked the troll so much, and I didn’t know if you’d like me. Cause the troll was taller, since I had these platform shoes, and bigger, and what if you liked me as a person, but didn’t think I’m hot? At that point, I knew I wanted to kiss you again and again… Wow. I really made a mess of it.”
Cass slouches behind me with a hum on his lips. “Oh that’s so dumb, Mattie! I just—” He sighs and hugs me more firmly. “I knew Logan and I weren’t really a good match at that point. The troll was just an excuse to have a crazy adventure and seek out this sweet guy who got shy after kissing me.”
I laugh and have to stuff a sweet waffle in my mouth when my cheeks flame. “I wasn’t expecting—I don’t know what I was expecting, but you were forward. I liked it but still freaked out. You grabbed my ass like you meant business. I’m not used to that.”
“Is that… something that makes you uncomfortable? Having your ass grabbed?”
“No, I… I really liked it actually. I got so hard.” I laugh at the awkwardness of it all, but there’s no more shame in Cassian’s arms. “So I panicked when someone came over. And it was my first ever kiss with a guy. I think I got scared of how much I liked it.”
Cassian pulls on my shoulder and turns me around. I tighten my hold on the waffle, getting my fingers stickier, but the heat of his gaze makes me stop chewing. His eyes seem brighter than usual, and he swallows, pinning me in place with his gaze. My heart beats so fast I feel like I might faint.
Cassian exhales, opens his mouth, and exhales again before speaking. “I love you. And it really killed me when you were with Emily. But now you’re here with me, and you’re gay, and I want to make sure we’re on the same page.”
There’s that itching in my eyes again. My heart overflows. “I can’t take back time. But I meant what I yelled in the street last night. I love you. I want to be with you. With Emily, I always had this sense that something wasn’t quite right. She must have felt it, and that’s why she broke up with me. She did us both a favor.”
Cassian chews on his lip. “Yeah, but what now? You’re only discovering yourself. It’s not fair of me to expect that you just settle for the first guy you kissed. I know I didn’t.”