Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 82955 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82955 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
It’s not unhealthy to know I was an asshole. It just sucks to know I hurt someone because of it.
Laughter rumbles through her, but it’s the tear that transfers to my skin that has me pulling back to look at her. “Why are you crying? And laughing?”
She swipes under her eyes, and another laugh stumbles out of her mouth. “It just seems all so silly now. Hearts get broken all the time. I’m not special.”
“You are, though, and you didn’t deserve it.”
“You don’t know if I deserved it. That’s the irony.” She staggers back another step. “I could tell you anything—”
“You won’t lie to me.” I grab her hands. I don’t pull her back, and I don’t erase the distance. I just need to touch her to know that we can get through this if we stick together. “I know you won’t.”
Her eyes search mine above a heavy sigh. “You’re right. I won’t. I can’t protect you more than myself. You kissed me, Brandon. You kissed me at sixteen and made me a promise that I could trust you. Not six hours later, that trust was gone. You and Chantilly Flickinger were quite the couple that night.”
“Chantilly Flickinger? Shit, I haven’t heard that name in years.” I balk from the implication. “And we were never a couple.”
“I saw you with my own two eyes,” she snaps. It’s an impressive breath she takes to slow old feelings from resurfacing like they’re brand new. “You spent years asking me to go out with you. I finally gave in and stupidly sealed that with a kiss. My first kiss, I might add.”
“For the record, it was my first kiss as well.” My heart stops, my mouth still hanging open like I have more to say, but nothing comes. Only a feeling like I was on top of the world when I kissed Autumn that day. Dropping my head, I close my eyes. Red hair and green eyes, freckles, and the sweetest lips. “Under the bleachers before practice.” I look up to find her gaze locked on me. “We kissed under the bleachers before warm-up for the game that night.”
She slams into me, her arms holding me so tight I couldn’t slip away if I wanted. “You remember?”
“I remember.” I close my eyes, trying to summon more from that day but coming up short. Instead, I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut. “I remember waiting for you, feeling dread with every minute that passed.”
Nodding, she says, “I showed up to see you and Chantilly . . .”
“Me and her doing what?”
Her eyes close as she rubs her temple. “She had her arms around you while you were talking to a group of your football buddies. I can still see you like it was yesterday.”
“But what did you see? I get she had her arms around me. I can’t answer for that, but I can tell you I never dated Chantilly. I never had any interest in her. We didn’t kiss. Hell, she used to ask me for rides from school sometimes, and I wouldn’t even do that. I didn’t want to lead her on.”
“Well”—she scoffs—“you were leading her on that night, and making me regret that first kiss.”
“I’m sorry.” Seems like the only thing I can say when I don’t have the full picture.
She plops on the arm of the chair, looking at me like this has taken the wind from her sails. “It was a betrayal. I’d lost my parents and was struggling to find my place in the family that still existed. Throw school into the mix, and I wasn’t doing well. I even quit band that year. But you were there, like you’d been since we were little, steadfast and fully convinced we were meant to be together. Who wouldn’t fall for that?”
“Until I fucked it up.” I shift my weight to be closer to her, holding my hand out and hoping she doesn’t reject me.
Her gaze volleys from my eyes to the offering and back again before she takes it, pulling me in and saying, “I never had a good relationship after that. I’ve been too self-sufficient to rely on anyone.” Standing, she looks up at me. There’s no pain in her eyes, no anger toward me, nothing short of acceptance. “I’m starting to think if I had talked to you, it all could have been cleared up.” Dropping her head to my chest, she says, “A lie has shaped my entire life. I might need some time to process that we wasted years that could have been spent together if I’d only known the truth of what happened. Because that now changes everything.”
CHAPTER 26
AUTUMN
Have we managed to do the impossible and overcome our differences?
Seems so, and it was simpler than I imagined. I finally saw the truth hidden in the lies I told myself.