Total pages in book: 63
Estimated words: 62569 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 313(@200wpm)___ 250(@250wpm)___ 209(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 62569 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 313(@200wpm)___ 250(@250wpm)___ 209(@300wpm)
It was like I just said, look I really think sweet potatoes are superior to normal potatoes, and she responded with, well if that’s how you feel.
Wait, did she really just say that out loud.
Her eyes flashed as she repeated the words. “If that’s how you feel, Ace.”
I yelled after that, no I snapped and I lost my shit. How the hell is she turning this one me? “If that’s how I FEEL?”
“Yeah.” She backed away from me, hands on hips.
“HOW I FEEL?” I roared. “Do you even know how I feel right now? How fucking terrified I was when you were on that table dying? When we couldn’t get Lily out? Don’t just toss out how I feel as if it’s not important. Maybe you’d know how I feel if you actually asked. But yes, Raven, this is how I feel. Do whatever you want with your life as long as you stay safe and Lily stays safe. I’m fine.” I felt like dying and couldn’t remember how to breathe, but I was totally completely fine.
“Then what about you?” Her eyes snapped to mine with fury. “What about—”
“I’ll fucking die a eunuch. I don’t know Raven!”
“You’re an idiot and guys have needs—”
“Shit, if you keep talking right now I’m going to break something. I’m aware of what needs I have but I’m a little too focused on keeping the two of you alive and happy. That’s what I live for right now, not my fucking cock, so if you could please either react and punch me or prepare me for when you do start seeing other guys I’d really appreciate it, and I’d appreciate if you just kept it quiet since I’m not so sure my pride could take another blow right—”
Her fist came flying so hard and fast, shocking the hell out of me that I didn’t even realize she’d punched me until the numbness in my cheek wore off and replaced itself with searing pain and tingling that radiated all the way down my neck and had my jaw in a chokehold. “You jack ass!”
“I was just—”
“You were just being a complete dick! Do you even hear yourself? I was being sarcastic! Do you really want someone else stripping me naked? Do you want to share any part of me? What about that vow that my life is yours and yours is mine? Was that complete bullshit?”
“No.” I braced her by the shoulders. “But this is fucking worse than cutting off parts of my body—I can’t keep cutting from a heart I’ve already given away, Raven. It seeps into my bones, my blood, it keeps me awake at night. It’s a slow torture that never goes away. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t watch you suffer and take care of you and my own fucking feelings.”
“And how”—she glared—“do you feel?”
“Like I’m one confession away from disappearing—because I don’t know who I am without you by my side.”
Tears slid down her cheeks. She shoved past me and went into the kitchen. I hung my head.
What was done was done.
I should leave.
Get some fresh air.
Maybe get drunk.
No, that would be irresponsible.
Something hit me in the back of the head, it wasn’t a fist. I turned around and stared at the floor.
It was a box.
There was writing on the outside. It simply said. “Bring your fork.”
“I was going to give it to you after Lily was born, it was supposed to be waiting here when we got home. Then the coma happened, then life happened, and the longer I waited the more I doubted you’d accept it. I was going to give it to you today and tell you everything, but instead you turned into a bigger ass than a few years ago, a feat, even for you.”
I stared at the handwriting and very slowly opened the box and pulled out another.
It was waffle mix.
She’d gotten me waffle mix.
And on that box she’d written. “Make that two forks.”
I dropped it onto the ground.
I couldn’t see my hands.
I couldn’t feel my body.
I moved.
And then I had her in my arms and I was kissing her, mouth fusing to hers in pressure so filled with pain that I was sick with it.
She jumped up.
I caught her in my arms again still kissing her and shoving her against the wall. Her hands reached for my shirt, pulling it over my head.
“I love you,” she panted between kisses. “I loved you since before I hurt you. I hurt you because your love was scary, Ace. I hurt us because once you say the word out loud—”
“You can’t take it back,” I whispered against her mouth. “Please, please,” I begged. “Don’t fucking take it back.”
“Never.” She jerked my head back by the hair. “I really, really hope you’re done with that stupid fast or I’m going to kill you.”