Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 96512 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96512 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
And then the thought hits me like a sucker punch—a career in art requires me letting go of things I currently have in my life.
Is it the same? The sacrifice is bigger, isn’t it? But the potential upside is too.
I shake my head. No, it’s not the same. It’s not like I can give up my job. I have a mortgage to pay and food to put on the table. The sacrifice isn’t worth it. Plus, Riley’s in school. It’s not like I can uproot her and move to New York. I’m pretty sure they don’t have many abandoned sweet shops that only charge a homemade pecan pie and a bottle of wine for rent every month.
My phone bleeps on the table next to Riley.
“It’s Fisher!” she says. “Can he come over? He’s fun, and I bet he’d have a lot of ideas of what to do in a rainstorm.”
I roll my eyes, deliberately not saying no, because then we’ll just get into a debate about why Fisher can’t come over, and I don’t think I can stand it. I want to see him, but I don’t want my daughter growing attached.
I swipe open the message as Riley continues to ask me about Fisher.
Fisher: Hey, what are you doing this rainy day?
I grin helplessly at the message. I have no idea why. It’s not a particularly sweet or romantic message. It’s just good to hear from him. It’s nice to know he’s thinking about me.
Me: We’re just deciding. Riley’s bored and balked at the idea of putting up the Christmas tree in May. No idea why.
“Who are you messaging, Mommy? Tell me! Is it Fisher?”
“Yes, sweet girl, it’s Fisher.”
“Can he come over? Please, Mommy! We could all watch a movie together. It would be so much fun! We could even get the popcorn machine out. We have corn!”
My phone beeps again.
Fisher: The Christmas tree? Am I missing something? Sometimes Star Falls feels like a far-off planet I just landed on.
I can’t help but grin again. He can make me smile like no other man.
Me: We’re just trying to find something fun to do on such a rainy day. She wants you to come over.
I don’t know why I add the last bit. I’ve been completely clear about not wanting Riley to become attached to him, but I’m basically leaving him an opening to say he can come over. Why? So I can tell him no? Again?
Three dots appear, and I stare at the phone as Riley tries to figure out on the calendar how many days there are until we can put our Christmas decorations up for real.
I stare at the phone and realize it was no accident that I mentioned Riley wants Fisher to come over. I want Fisher to say he’s free. I want to see him. I want him here.
Maybe Riley will be upset when Fisher leaves. But it’s not like we’ve been dating two years and he’s living with us. I’m being overprotective. And she likes Fisher.
I start to type.
Me: If you’re free, and you don’t mind a day watching movies and listening to an eight-year-old talk about Christmas, we’d both love to see you.
I take a deep breath and press send.
Fisher responds in seconds.
I’m on my way and I’m bringing snacks. What are Riley’s favorites?
I bite back a smile.
Me: Anything with too much sugar and not enough nutrition.
“Fisher’s coming over,” I announce.
Riley whips her head around. “Really?”
“We can watch movies. Set up the popcorn machine. It’ll be fun.”
“It will be fun, Mommy. I promise! Do you think Fisher likes Disney movies?”
He doesn’t know what he’s let himself in for. “Maybe,” I say.
We’re still trying to find the perfect movie when Fisher raps on the door.
“I’ll get it!!” Riley yells, jumping up from the couch and running to the door.
“Hey, Riley,” Fisher says. “Thanks for inviting me over. I was so bored today.”
I take him in as he and Riley greet each other. He looks so tall next to her. He’s tall anyway, but next to Riley, he looks like and giant and she looks tiny. His hair’s wet and I wonder if it’s from the rain. It looks darker than it usually does, and suddenly I have a vision of him fucking me in the shower. How his chest would look covered with water droplets, how I’d want to sink to my knees in front of him and take him—
“Mom!” Riley yells, despite me standing right next to her. “Fisher brought games!”
I snap out of my shower fantasies and focus on what’s actually in front of me.
“Hey, that’s great,” I say, as I peer into the gigantic duffle bag Fisher’s brought with him. “Looks like you have every single game imaginable in there.”
“Well, I didn’t know which ones you already had, and they had a ton at the Club,” Fisher says, grinning at me. I can’t help but smile back. It’s so good to see him.